What So Proudly We Hailed

Tonight was Luke's first ever band concert. He was in the third grade chorus last year, so it wasn't his first ever concert, but in our town's public schools you can't take an instrument until 4th grade. Luke has been playing his cousin Kate's hand-me-down tenor sax since early in the school year. Sometime in late January he also started going in to school 45 minutes early one day a week to practice with the fourth grade band.

Luke's tenure as a tenor saxophonist has certainly had its ups and downs. Way back at the end of third grade he came home with the "introductory" packet in which he was supposed to rank his top three instrument choices. While we were walking my friend Mara's dog, Luke explained to me that he wanted to play flute. Now I confess (but you should know I've already been chastened for this by several people), I talked him out of it. I just pictured all the flute players of my youth (wan girls even a soprano could break in two) and I thought flautist=girl. I know this is not very forward-thinking. I know there are probably some very talented and famous male flautists out there. But in my defense, Luke has two moms. Furthermore, his reasons for choosing the flute were kind of half-baked. As I recall, it was because he thought it would be easy. When I asked him what instrument he would like to play when he's an adult, if they were all equally easy to learn, he chose sax. Now I don't know if you listen to "Wait! Wait! Don't Tell Me!" but I do, and one thing I've learned from that show is that saxophonists get the babes. Is wanting grandchildren a crime? I have lived to regret that conversation some days this year as I watched the poor kid (60 pounds soaking wet) try to lug the huge instrument to school and back. A flute would probably fit in his backpack. But the universe clearly thought I did the right thing, and it rewarded me in the form of a niece who told me she still had her saxophone from elementary school and Luke could borrow it, saving us what I'm sure would have been a hefty instrument rental fee.

The next big drama in our year of saxophone happened in about November. It started with Luke asking me, "Mom, can you fail saxophone?" That night he had trouble falling asleep. A couple of nights later, after lights out, I found him crying in his bed. He confessed that he hadn't been practicing sax when he was supposed to (with the babysitter) and he was terrified that when it came time to perform in public it would be a disaster. He was so upset, and as a result, I was so upset, that I considered letting him stop sax altogether, until I talked to Tina and she said he had to pay the piper. So we told him he was going to have to start practicing every day, but both of us also worked with him for a while, helping him figure out some of the basics he was struggling with. Do I know how to play a tenor sax, you might rightly ask? No, but luckily the book included a diagram with finger positions for each note. Let's just say, it wasn't rocket science. Tina worked with him, too, and by Christmas he was feeling so much better about the sax that he even played some carols to the assembled family at my mom's on Christmas Day.

So tonight, at seven, in the big Middle School auditorium, was his concert. He looked adorable in his white shirt, black pants, and red bow tie. Tina, Matteo & I were seated in the front on the side that offered the best view of Luke. I had rescheduled my last client so I could get there a little early. The first number was the combined fourth and fifth grade bands. The director asked us to stand, and they played "The Star Spangled Banner." They had barely started, when I was overcome with emotion. It was all I could do not to completely bawl. They just sounded so good, so much like a real band, and they looked so smart and professional up there, and there he was doing something I can't do, something I've never done, and something I think is really valuable and worthwhile. They were playing the national anthem, by God, and it was good! And it got me thinking about how he's playing soccer this fall, and he's in the band, and I know there's a lot of talk about kids today being over-scheduled and having too many activities, but the flip side of that is my little guy is getting to try out all these great things, and who knows if he'll end up being a band kind of guy, or a soccer kind of guy, or some other kind of guy altogether, but I'm happy he's getting to try a bunch of different stuff so he can decide. I managed to keep from completely breaking down, but it was touch and go for pretty much the whole banner there.

After the band played, the small jazz band played, and then they brought in the fourth and fifth grade chorus. I was shocked. There were more than 100 kids in the chorus! I think Luke is one of only a handful of kids NOT doing chorus this year. I later found out in the car that their music teacher/chorus director brings in munchkins one day a year and also throws a pizza party one day. She also told the kids she'd do three cartwheels if a certain number of kids joined chorus. Anyway, I think they should give that woman a medal for dealing with all 100-plus nine- and ten-year-olds by herself at 7:45 a.m. half the year.



After the concert we went out for ice cream to celebrate, and Luke invited his friend Dylan to join us. (That's when I got the dirt about the munchkins, pizza, and cartwheels). Luke said he wants to do chorus instead of band next year, but I told him he should do it in addition to band, because his concert was so great and I was so proud of him. I know, more mommy interference. But I'll tell you, that version of the Star Spangled Banner was one of my proudest moments as a parent. There are just too many not-so-proud moments during the year to give that up without a fight.